The Gap Between The Pauses

When was the last time we praised the House of Tar-jay? Yesterday I was in there and discovered this generously sized basket - nay almost a mega BUCKET - in which we, the consumers, can place the treasures we find at that citadel of retailing opulence. Maybe they pinched the idea from Colonel Sanders , I'm not sure, but the fact that we will be able to BUY MORE without wheeling a cumbersome trolley through the aisles, makes one feel happy and satisfied with the Target experience. Mr Trivia

 According to the Wikipedia ‘tsk!’ is American English and ‘tut!’ is English. Both are supposed to be onomatopoeic representations of the disapproving sound one makes with the teeth and tongue to indicate disapproval. Personally, I prefer the ‘tsk’ to the ‘tut’ but let’s focus on the doughnut and not the hole, fellow zeitgeisters. I learnt early on the power of the ‘tsk’ from my mother. Strangely she didn’t overuse it in real life, preferring to reserve it for watching television. Some of jewels of 1970s and 1980s television were tsked over with great gusto. The bombing of NUMBER 96, Fergo the Freak’s reign of Terror in PRISONER, JR’s latest dirty trick in DALLAS; all were occasions upon which Mum would shake her head and tsk at the acts of low character she saw taking place first on the Healing black and white set, then on our Kriesler 36-inch colour telly. Over the years, I’ve become used to Mum’s habit of dismissing a character’s act of evil with the slow, tut. Usually a tr...

The classic Australian Icon of clothes drying. The Hills Hoist of the '50s and '60s. Note the pitiful modern clothesline in the b/g. The traditional Hills Hoist is as Australian as an Irish theme pub, a dim sim in a baine marie or a replacement coat hanger car radio aerial bent into the shape of Australia. I never feel more emotional about this wide brown land than when I hear the Qantas tykes singing Sir Peter Allen's "I Still Call Australia Home." Despite the fact I am always in Australia when I hear it. That's Oz for youse, she gets into your system and never leaves. She's like a hood kind of malaria. Remember, peeps, Australia isn't K Rudd or James Packer or even Jennifer Hawko. Australia is Daryl Somers and Ossie Ostrich. G'day and good luck to thee and thine. Mr Trivia

Monday. Sick at home and thus unable to educate today’s youth to not say LOL as a word. Not that I can manage this even when I’m there. I discover day-time television is as terrible as night-time television with a couple of subtle differences. Day-time TV is filled with infomercials about buying life insurance without a medical and infomercials for bagless, cyclonic Dyson ripoff vacuum cleaners that can pick up a bowling ball using just suction. Night-time telly is filled with infomercials about how the whole world is going crazy for Zumba and informercials with scantily clad ladies (some of whom can pick up a bowling ball using just suction) who want you to call them NOW for just $20.00 a minute.

The first exciting instalment of  Mr Trivia's science-fiction tale is here!! The Insomniac’s Calendar – Part 1 It was late. God, it was 2010. There were things he could have done. Things he could be doing. But Rory Insteppe options had been reduced to one unpalatable choice. Get out of his flat before the Firecops arrived. He’d been warned five times already. A sixth time would mean jailtime for the popular weather blogger and alternative universe conspiracy theorist. Rory wasn’t famous in the old sense. Not like Betty and Barney Hill the first recorded UFO abductees. Rory was a famous as anyone on public Internet who had their own show. His was called MULTIVERSE EXPOSED and featured tweets from friends, and the occasional hatebomb from games he’d formerly been addicted to. For all of 2008 he’d been immersed in THE LAST BLOODY CAMPAIGN OF WAYNE THORPE’S BOGAN VAMPIRES. If he hadn’t been employed by Centrelink he would have lost his job. At the time Centrelink were locked i...