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Showing posts from July, 2006

Ultra Extreme Makeover

Pathetic and irrelevant attempt to photoshop Asimo, the cute Honda Robot, into an image of the historic city of Fremantle, W.Australia.

If you’ve ever watched the US television show Extreme Makeover, then you know the drill (and the bone-saw). The idea is that people ranging from the physically dowdy to the literally deformed are given major cosmetic surgery to their faces and bodies. Mostly the team of doctors and trainers are fixing the damage done by gravity, bad diets and ultra violet light. Occasionally the recipient does seem to need the procedure to change the quality of their life.

I am not attracted to the idea of a liposuction, a brow lift or Da Vinci Veneers. My interest would be in some form of cybernetic enhancement.

An eye that was also a laser that could cut through steel, concrete and glass for example. Or perhaps fingers that could morph into useful tools like Allen Keys and Phillips’ head screwdrivers before snapping back into original digital form.


Domestic Blindness


Domestic Blindness, like it’s better known cousin Colour Blindness, is a genetic condition affecting more men than women. And guys, between us for just a second, I know that it’s easier to ask mum/girlfriend/wife where something is, than doing it for ourselves, but I think there’s a point where it’s no longer age-appropriate.

That point is any time after your 30th birthday. However, there is a simple cure that I developed several years ago when I first lived on my own. Having come from a co-habitation scenario where I regularly and hilariously said, “Honey, do you know where the _____ is,” I now found myself with no one of whom to ask this question.

So instead, I took my Domestic Blindness into the workplace and regularly needed assistance in finding things I had misplaced. Naturally I abided by state and national laws and didn’t use the endearment “honey”. But the principle was the same.

What I discovered was that within thirty seconds of a female co-worker saying someth…

Shameless Cross Promotion

So now that you're here, Zeitgesiters, why not suss out the other excellent blogs in the Mr Trivia family? I refer in particular to Ask Mr Trivia. It's the blog where you can ask advice from a semi-fictional character with a pseudonym. Now there's a basis for trust.

Here's an example of the stirling work I do.

Hi Mr Trivia,
I am a 40 year old man working in the hospitality industry.
Four weeks ago I broke up with my girlfriend of five years.
I have spent the intervening time feeling angry, rejected,
sad and stupid. The last straw came today.

I pulled a sickie and just layon the couch knocking back scotch and watching daytimetelevision. I saw this little robot Lemsip packet in the new Lemsip Max commercial and startedcrying. Then I saw a baby panda on an ABC promo and I cried even more.

Finally I saw an episode of Stargate - and Claudia Black from Farscape guest starred - and I found myself VERY attracted to her.Let me stress, that Farscape and Stargate are pieces of c…

Toadying Lickspittles

Hi Zeitgeisters,

This is not a political blog. Astute readers will have surmised I'm a bit of a lefty, but this blog is about pop culture and personal observations. So just a brief detour today, promise.

Note my lovely photo-shopped image of Australian Prime Minister John Howard. He has been in the news over the last two days because the media have a whiff of a Federal Liberal leadership challenge. The Treasurer Peter Costello believes he had made a deal with the PM for a "smooth transition" and that it is time for the PM to make good. Fine. Whatever.

Sure, the sense of entitlement in this set-up leaves me a little queasy, but nothing produced an outright sense of nausea until today.

This event occurred outside the PM's place. He was returning from his daily walk and a couple of people had turned up to display a banner that said something like: We "Heart" John Howard. One of these folks even shouted "John Howard Forever" in support of the PM.


Celebrating AFHVS

And Zeitgeisters, if you don’t know what AFHVS stands for, you’ll be stunned to discover it means Australia’s Funniest Home Video Show (Nine Network).

And yes. AFHVS is mediocre, mainstream, middle-of-the-road and vanilla. Or is it? (I learnt that little technique in high school debating.)

No, it’s actually bold, ground-breaking and revolutionary. “And why the hell is that. Mr Trivia?” I hear you ask.

Let us rewind to a recent Saturday. Witness the following: video-tape of a middle-aged couple sitting on a porch swing. Naturally, they swing back and forth. And like everyone else, I was thinking, yep, them chains is gonna bust and them two is gonna end up on th’floor! (Sorry , I’ve been watching the The Andy Griffith Show on Access 31). However, totally against all expectations, a dog leapt up and one of the couple fell out of the swing!

That chain was supposed to break! After fifteen years of AFHVS there was nothing else that the chain could do, but break. It was a certainty as so…