The Grate Gatsby

Zeitgeisters,

I know I’m supposed to be mature about this and ignore it. But if I cannot rant ineffectually to youse guys, then where? When? That’s why we ‘blog, right?

I just read these words:

Paris Hilton was released from a Los Angeles County jail early Thursday because of an unspecified medical problem and will fulfill the reminder of her sentence in home confinement, a sheriff's spokesman said.

Are they really trying to tell the good people of Los Angeles County that her medical condition is so much worse than any other inmate that she can be detained at home? There’s no one else in the slammer that can get home detention, her condition is so peculiar that she deserves special treatment? If she’s so ill why isn’t she being put in some kind of sick-bay with medical attention?

These are rhetorical questions, of course. I actually don’t hate Hilton. The problem is that she is the icon of an age when doing nothing, meaning nothing, thinking nothing and producing nothing is seen as admirable. She has achieved exactly zero, except for allowing her image to be captured by the paparazzi. They love her because she poses for photographs and doesn’t run from them.

In the public mind she is linked with Lindsay, Britney and Jessica, but all of them, yes, even Jessica, have actual careers of some kind. Paris is a dilletante, a hobbyist and a tourist. In fact, she behaves like someone who will never have to work a day in her life.

So her role model status is puzzling. You cannot aspire to be born into money. That blankness of hers is the look of someone who doesn’t know who she is and no apparent drive to find out.

Do we know a single position she holds on anything (insert your own sex-tape gag here)? What the f**k are we doing looking at this pampered twit? (Yes, I see the irony of my positing this and then writing some 350 words about it. Y’got me.)

As for that nonsense with the prison sentence, let’s chant it in unison: "Money talks. Bullshit walks."

Elevate the Insignificant,

Mr Trivia