Stationary Travelator Part 1

By Gerald Fie
Garden City's travelator has been broken for weeks. They've even had a nice sign made. The Travelator is on an incline, so it's like a lazy escalator. And of course a stationary travelator is a shiny metallic grooved ramp.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What's with George Eads' Hair?

By
Image
DailyCeleb.com & David Edwards Hey Zeitgeisters, Bet you thought this blog would never top “ What’s with Bradley Whitford’s Hair? ” For those of you who weren’t part of that historical blog entry, it was the glittering moment where I wondered what’s with West Wing star Bradley Whitford’s hair. Good times. However, tonight, while watching the current series (in Australia) of CSI :Original Recipe , I was forced to witness the unpleasantness of George Eads’ new(ish) 'do and I felt compelled to blog on’t. George plays the part of Nick Stokes and has spent some 5 or 6 seasons with a haircut “you could set your watch to,” as Grandpa Simpson might say. It was always short; it always had that US Marine Corps vibe; it was always as dependable as the ebbing and flowing of the tides. Now in something of an El Nino effect, I note that someone in Jerry Bruckheimer’s organization has decided to mess with the length of George’s crowning glory. Although I chiefly watch CSI wa...
Read more

What’s with Bradley Whitford’s Hair?

By
Image
Okay, Zeitgeisters, that’s as shallow an attention-grabbing start as one could ever want, but I really want to know. And sure, I’m really talking about Josh Lyman’s hair. (I’m like one of those people who insist on calling an actor by their character’s name – only in reverse. e.g. “Go Knight Boat!”) Whitford plays Deputy Chief of Staff, Josh Lyman, in the Aaron Sorkin -created, NBC television series The West Wing . He plays this part to a tee and now he’s set to do great things in the new Sorkin drama, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip . I know this last bit because the Angriest Ex-Video Store Clerk in the world told me. Oh, and Whitford ’s married to the awesome Jane Kaczmarek who plays mom, Lois, in the series Malcolm in the Middle. So Mr Whitford’s your regular pop-cultural icon and yardstick for excellence. We’re here in this, frankly, puzzling cultural landscape, because I’ve just finished watching season four of The West Wing on DVD. And Josh Lyman’s hair has bothered me througho...
Read more

Institutional Memory

By Gerald Fie
Image
Note: If you’re here, you were connected with Perth’s Film and Television Institute at some point. The FTI in the form that we know it, is being wound up and some of its functions are being taken over by ScreenWest. This is my idiosyncratic tribute to the FTI as it was formerly. I’m not someone who plans things. Depending on how well you know me, you might be saying “Amen to that” right about now. There was no plan to have anything to do with filmmaking when my friends and I entered our first efforts in the WA Film and Video Festival almost 35 years ago (forerunner of the WASAs). We made experimental films on Super 8 movie film; in-camera editing, falling down sand dunes, raw meat and tomato sauce representing the terrible effects of our filmic violence.   Super-8 was the cheapest type of movie film. 8 millimetres in width. You could shoot two-and a-half to three-and-a-half minutes depending on your frames-per-second. We had no money, so shot “longer” at 18 fps. Our ti...
Read more

The Multiverse According To Von Disco

By Mr Trivia
Image
Esteban von Disco saw his first moonbow (a nighttime rainbow) whilst dog-sledding with his family across Alaska at age 1. “It transformed me from a baby, wasting time and precious resources, into a being of sheer wondrous potential. I saw the infinite and was unafraid.” Three decades later, in March 2017, he deploys GENERIC | LOGO on all platforms, in all markets, simultaneously, osmotically and with maximum humility. As he explains, “You’re in the middle of a forest fire and the sun goes nova. And you’re like – “I get it”. Von Disco conlangs at genius level. “Sun Tzu and the Buddha, they grok me, bruh.”  Indeed, they are very much the spiritual underwriters of the GENERIC | LOGO exemplar and IPO.  Think back to the normcore era when life was basic and artisanal insecticide was not yet a thing. “I had the year from Hell,” he says” My haircut guy dies. He’s crossing the street with my lunch time ramen, his Zimmer frame gets caught in a car bumper and BOOM!” GENER...
Read more

Legal Shmegal

By
Image
Zeitgeisters, Have you seen Boston Legal on television? I never plan to watch, because it’s barely a show. It’s the vaguest wisp of a narrative, the tiniest shred of a drama. The program skates on thin ice episode after episode. Every case is bizarre and jokey. There are little breaking-the -fourth -wall gags. There’s the annoying shakey-cam. And the even more annoying theme and incidental music that scream “look there’s something zingy & funny going on”. Mostly its difficult to suspend one’s of disbelief, when viewing BL, but somehow it all ends up being perversely entertaining. Why? Because BL creator David E Kelly’s penchant for oddball concepts (which he has demonstrated on his other shows e.g. The Practice, Boston Public, Chicago Hope and Picket Fences ) is given full rein in this show - even more so than in the tedious Ally McBeal . So the writing is good-ish, but it’s the acting that brings it home. James Spader, William Shatner and Candice Bergen are great. They deal w...
Read more

The Science of Silkening Our Language

By Gerald Fie
Image
If you're a Generation X-er like myself, you may remember the above headline as a parody of the slogan of a shampoo called Silkience.  The Science of Silkening Your Hair  was the promise with every bottle. I guess the name itself was a portmanteau word that shoved  silk  together with  science  in an unholy humentipeding of the two commonly used dictionary terms. The sharp-eyed amongst you will recognise humentipede  as a portmanteau neologism recently invented by me in the previous sentence. And yes, I have sewn together the word  human  and  centipede  and thus blatantly ripped off the rather repellent concept invented by Dutch filmmaker Tom Six for his series of  Human Centipede  movies. I come neither to praise Tom Six nor mention his work any further, I am here to discuss words and the writing of same.  The science of silkening one's hair sounds good. It is supposed to bring on though...
Read more

Christmas Telly Highlights 2012

By Mr Trivia
Image
No, Virginia, The He Man and She-Ra  Christmas Special (1985) is not on this year Hail Zeitgeisters, Obviously today is a day for family etc. what would you be doing watching the telly, eh?  However if you do wish to cast your eye over what’s on the free-to-air digital, you’ll find slim pickings. We’ve had a quick look and chosen some highlights also some “highlights” This selection is based on the Perth guide which will be similar to the guide in many capital cities, but there may be some regional differences. NATIVITY (2010) 9.16 AM-11.00 AM (ABC 1) Mr Maddens, a primary school teacher, is charged with producing the school's nativity play and competing against the posh rival school for the honour of 'best show in town'. Martin Freeman from THE OFFICE (UK) is the lead in what is a well-regarded family movie according to many on-line, although I thought this was awful when I saw it on Christmas Eve. Suss it out yourselves though when it is repeated today....
Read more

The Christmas Box

By
Image
Zeitgeister(s), If you have the good fortune to be in Perth, Western Australia, on December the 25th then you could be enjoying temperatures of 38 degrees Celsius (approx 100 degrees Fahrenheit). At some point in this emotionally fraught, tiring day of good cheer, family and over-indulgence, you are likely to sit down in front of the cathode ray tube;and we are here to help our fellow Perthites. Although on this blog and the accompanying site , we tend to be relentlessly opposed to so-called free-to-air, so-called commercial television, at this time of Peace on Earth and Good Will to All, we believe it best to dial down the curmudgeonly-ness. So join with us as we point out those Christmas gems that can be dug from the otherwise barren earth of Free To Air telly (commercial and non). Seven Network Starting with our friends on the commercial Networks, this year’s undoubted king of the ratings, the Seven Network, has a glittering range of options. Our attention is peaked at 2.20pm with ...
Read more

Marketing, Huh?!

By
Image
Creativity and commercialism collide Zeitgeisterinos, Most of us have developed effective filters for advertising. We know when we’re being sold to or marketed at. So it’s pleasant to see something new. I say new in the sense that this piece of advertising makes no sense at all. Yesterday, I was walking from the Perth train station and into the city when I spied this in Myer’s window. After walking on for half a dozen steps, I turned back and took another look because it didn’t compute. As far as I can tell the message is: “after shopping for great fashion why not visit our café and enjoy a hot beverage and a…” And a what? What IS that? A bagel with sesame seeds? A donut with sprinkles? Why is it circling that mannequin like a doughy life preserver or the rings of Saturn rendered in pastry? I figured the interpretation of this mercantile art installation was beyond me, so I whipped out the trusty Nokia and took a photo. Seriously, what the heck is going on here? Mr Trivia
Read more

The Wheels of Perth City

By Gerald Fie
Image
I am confident that the good folk over at The Worst of Perth will have looked into this, but I couldn't find a mention of this over there. Not that I searched for more than a couple of minutes; their site is dense with Perthcentric gold. Have a look some time. Anyhow, when I was a kid, Transperth–then the Metropolitan Transport Trust–ran a campaign encouraging Perthites to take the bus. There was a jaunty tune which sadly I cannot reproduce here and a sprightly lyric which went something like this: We are the wheels of Perth City Leave the driving to us We are the Wheels of Perth (Take it easy) Come on and take the bus! There was even a mascot for all of this, an actual MTT bus driver nicknamed "Jimmy". This is something like thirty years ago, but my memory has him as John Denver looking fellow. And if you don't know who the late John Denver was - ask your grandfather. I believe Jimmy's brief was to be friendly; being a child at this time, I found t...
Read more